"Barn you can't put this on the blog,,,"

Well let’s see. What is happnin round here.
What could we talk about? We could talk about me catching a cat in a raccoon trap, but I am not allowed. Long story.




I could tell yoos all about the meals I been cookin up but that would be boring.
No, wait. Heres an interesting meal. Meat Turtles.




Meatloaf wrapped in bacon with wiener legs.
Mrs. Barn said no-fuckin-way so I got one and Scurvy got the other.

Sad news.
Our favorite Chinese grocery has shut down. Replaced by a new huge Chinese grocery. Have not visited yet but will miss the little mini-mart.


Or we could chat about my upcoming trip to the land of plenty.
My reservations have been made for my trip to visit mom back in Denver.
Denver, you may have heard of it. I hear it is all over the news lately as their football team is barfing up TWENTY MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS,,,,, A YEAR,,,, to some asshole who can throw a football. Can’t do nothing else, just throw a football.
A 5 year contract for 100,000,000$.
It’s a long story but as we were leaving that country, they were voting on their new stadium. And all this plays a part as to why we left.
When we told my mom we were moving to Belize she said, “why, those people are all crazy”.
Yea,, well,, they ain’t paying no one 100 million dollars to play a game now are they? Who’s crazy now?

Anyway,, as take off time approaches I do the usual pre-buying of stuff and ship it to mom’s house. I got a big rolling duffle I can fill up with goodies we can’t get here. Important shit like Campbells bean and bacon soup.
And there is always a surge in sales at my favorite camera store, B&H photo. I have been loading my shopping cart for weeks now. I got a message from them yesterday informing me that my cart was overflowing and would I like another cart?
Kinda like that greeter fella at WalMart, "Can I get ya a buggy?"
I said hell yea! I can go nuts shopping there.

Tonight I take the 150 steps to the V.I.P. Lounge where I will no doubt pick up some more totally useless gossip. Stay tuned.

Oh, and this morning I came up with some real good shit for the blog, but I forgot it.
I just wanted you to know that this is where it would have gone.





TRUE FACT: There is now a gay softball World Series.