Saturday, March 19, 2016

This Dick came,,,, and went!

What are we now about 3 weeks into construction? Sounds ‘bout right.
They are really haulin ass! Today they poured the slab under the house and they already have the post up for both decks. All this with a tiny generator and a small roll around cement mixer.
Today it has been hovering around 95-99 degrees and these young guys can be seen running with full wheelbarrows of cement! Makes a guy feel a bit old, watching from a safe distance.
They plan to have all the other columns up by the Easter break, next Wednesday.
Has not been too much of a headache for us. The drone of the gen and cement mixer seem to lull me to sleep!
On the other end of the property, it’s a different story.
All the sudden one fine morning, Hey Mo, Hey Larry pier construction crew began building a pier one lot to the north of us.
These guys also have a generator going and a water pump. The fumes from them are bad at times due to the direction of the breeze.
And they are just a bunch of naturaly noisy guys. Lots of yelling and hollerin, whoopin and shit.
So much so, we had a set of guests leave two days early due to the noise.
When he left he told me it was because he was sick and needed air conditioning. Nothing about noise.
I found out about the noise when I saw his review on trip advisor.
Neither of these problems are under our control, certainly not the pier construction.
And if we have to have a guest leave in order to get a new house, PHUCK HIM!
His name was Dick btw,, and he was every bit one while he was here.
Nobody knows how much I want to retire!

Saturday, February 27, 2016

I, state your name, do solemnly swear,,,,

Here’s some interesting shit.
A few months ago the US Embassy decided they needed a new Warden for this area. Seems the last one got fired. (another story)
So I was approached by some neighbors/drinkin buddies and asked if I wanted the job. Seemed like something interesting to do.
So I said Sure!
So bigger n shit, a few months later I met with my new ‘boss’/hottie for beers while she interviewed me. (thanks for the beers tax payers)
I got my package of supplies I could need and she thanked me and sent me on my way.
So what does a Warden do you ask? Well, not much. Mostly help spread whatever word the US embassy wants to get out to the US citizens. Emergency alerts, passport changes, and just help in whatever way they can.
Yesterday was the annual Warden’s luncheon at the Ambassadors house.
Yea, I had to find a clean pair of shorts and a shirt that Mrs. Barn thought fit the required dress code of ‘business casual’. Oh, and some shoes.
First half of the morning was listening to some speakers and just general crap we needed to know. A top cop, a immigration mucky muck, and FBI guy, and our ‘contacts’ at the embassy all spoke for a bit while we chomped on cake and coffee.
Then they packed our happy asses into a bus and took us to the other side of the compound to the Ambassador’s house for lunch.
Hey, I want you all to rest assured, your tax dollars were well spent on his humble digs.
Wholey shit, what a nice place! It could be confused for Pablo Escabars house!
I was not privy to a tour but glancing around after meeting Hiz Honor, you can tell what it was.
We all went out to the back yard which was of course landscaped perfectly where they had 4 tables set up for us and a chow line of food.
Got my grub and scammed a nice spot at one table.
Biggr n shit, Hiz Honor and his wife sat right next to me!
We chatted about some stuff, not the stuff I would normally chat about but it was pleasant. Nice guy and his wife too.
So lunch was good and when it was over he gave us a little attaboy speech, and then we packed back on the bus and made our way back to the embassy parking lot.
As we were leaving they gave us all our complimentary body bags!
You heard me right. The cops don’t have any so if someone croaks in my area, I supply the body bag and depending on the circumstances, a ride to the morgue in ‘Griga!
I think it depends on whether or not the cops are available or something.
Anyway, Mrs. Barn said flat out “no fuckin dead bodies in the new car”!
So Frank said I could haul whoever in the Mango’s truck.
Mom would be proud, if she could understand!
So all in all it was an interesting day. No terrorists showed up, not that they could do any damage. The fuckin doors to the place are 4in thick solid heavy muthers! It surprises you when you try to pull one open!
So lets hope there is no dying on my watch. Goddammit.

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

OK, where were we?

Ok, so I took some time off, now I may be back at it. Mrs.Barn said she would rather see me writing than watching youtube videos. I admit, I am addicted to youtube and I won’t be weening off anytime soon.
Got a few things we can talk about.
Did I mention Barnacle’s is for sale? Well it is.
We have had a pretty good amount of looky-loos come by to kick the tires but have not had an offer yet.
We don’t hate this job and we make a decent living from it so we can just keep on keeping on until it does sell. Although, I find myself acquiring a bad attitude at times. I get a bit short with the guests.
17 years of answering the same questions over and over and over and over and over and then over again is starting to drag me down. Sometimes I  make shit up just to keep it interesting.
And then there are all the great guests. The ones who have become friends over the years. I guess it all evens out.
I tell ya what. You want to meet all the real estate agents in town? Hang up a for sale by owner sign and watch how fast them leeches come by to say hi.
I don’t have any respect for that profession. Not so much the actual agents, but the profession.
It seems to me they will just say whatever it takes to get them some money.
Sure, there are some good ones out there but we can sell this place without them, we don’t need their help.
If this was in the states where there are millions of places for sale, and you need help finding the one you want, well I could see using them.
But here, there is one road and we are right on it. Everyone can see my sign just as well as they can see a real estate company sign. I can pitch my property better than any of them could, although one girl told me she could because she has the red white and blue behind her (remax), and then proceeded to tell me we could go behind their backs and save a percent or two! Somewhat sleezy?
They want something like 6-8% to be involved. We are asking 450,000 so you do them math.
We can get all the title work done square and legal for 500us bucks.
Moral of the story? They can all kiss my big, hairy, natural white ass!
So you are caught up on how I feel with that, let’s move on.

You may have noticed my passion for cooking has exploded. And I have an actual love affair going on with cast iron cookware. Is it strange to have a love for a skillet? Turns out no, it is not. I asked Frank at Mango’s who is an actual trained chef and re assured me I am fine. He apparently has a crush on a couple of his knives. No one is allowed near them! So I feel fine as I lovingly run my skillet under the warm water and rub it gently with oil,,,,hold on, I need a minute.
Whew,, that was good.
And that is one of the subjects I watch on youtube. Cooking videos. You can find anything you want and a dozen different ways to cook it. I really enjoy it.

So, Mrs. Barn has got me back to the blog, let’s see if I make a go at it again. This morning it feels right.
See ya in a day or so.

Sunday, September 13, 2015

And the beat goes on,,,,,,,

It happened again. We lost yet another good friend.
This time is was a terrible accident.
Some friends were drinking in a boat at a marina when for reasons I don't know, two of them, cousins and best friends, began playing with their 9mm pistols. Apparently, they were joking around and pointing them at each other when one went off.
And as a result we lost Vance Cabral.
He was shot in the head and died instantly.
Vance was a very well liked 45yr old Belizean who was a dive guide among other things.He had a way with the ladies, at least it looked like it to me, loved to party and just loved life in general.
I feel really bad for the cousin who not only has to live his life knowing he killed his best friend and cousin, but he has to deal with the cops as well and they may press some charges with him.
I think it could be manslaughter? I don't know but it is just a terrible incident all together.

R.I.P. Vance Cabral