Thursday, January 28, 2010

Is that my beer? And is that how you deliver it?

I received an email a few days ago describing how nice it is, after a hard day, to have a women bring you a cold beer.
Included with the email was a fantasy photo of what this sender assumes to be every mans dream.
Let’s dissect this situation and, one, see if we can clear up this misconception. And 2 see if I can do it without getting my nuts run through the blender.

OK,, firsts lets look at the fantasy photo.

We can all see the obvious pros to this situation right? Pretty girl, beer, and shes nekkid. What could be better?
First thing you notice is that keg is not tapped. And the fact she is lifting it makes you think it’s not full either.
Then it appears to be some weird brand, possibly German.

And isn’t it true that nobody like German beer? Don’t they drink it warm? Yeeeeck.
And when there’s kegs of beer around and a nekkid hottie, there is always the chance of a bunch of your drunken buddies showin up.
And what is left to the imagination here? Not much. Maybe that area directly behind the keg, but we can all guess what’s back there.

So what I believe we have here is a set-up photo. Not the real thing. This is just a fantasy if there ever was one.

Now, lets look at the real deal.

Here is my hottie with cold beer and she's heading straight for me!
First thing we notice is we know those beers are cold, we also know there is plenty more where they came from, and we know they are Belikin’s.
Now for the nekkid part.
Don’t you agree that having them fully clothed, then having to get them nekkid is part of the fun?
Kinda like a sport I suppose.
And I am the only one who gets to see the prizes!
It’s only fair, I do all the things required to get them clothes on the floor. I am not sharing what’s underneath with anyone! Right?
But Mrs. Barn being who she is, most have a pretty good idea what’s there.
(this could be the portion of the post where the blender gets plugged in)

So to sum it all up, I’ll take the real deal over the fantasy any day.
When you’re comfortable with each other you can work in your own fantasy.
Like me and my thing I have with teddy bear hamsters and a wrist-rocket.
And her when she makes me wear that Spiderman suit or has me act like Al Bundy.(?)
But I digress.

A babe in hand is worth more than what others are chasing!

Note: I did save the fantasy photo to a folder.


Brian said...

I would take the real one too over the fantasy but no real so fantasy does just fine!

DriveGoddess said...

Ok Barn.....those Germans are weird....warm beer my ass! Or should it read WARM BEER, my butt....the latter being mumbled or slurred depending on how many beers one has already consumed....

JRinSC said...

Being a rum guy (or rather that I greatly prefer rum to beer) I can't see what all the fuss is about.

Just point me back towards the rum please....

Harley said...

Hey Barn. Howdy Do. Mrs. Barn sure is smiling Big. You must keep that woman very happy for her to be so joyous to wait on you hand and foot. On another note. If Possible, would you please steer me to a BELIKIN T-Shirt. I'm having difficulty finding a site online. A phone # or local web site. Very Well Harley...