Saturday, July 18, 2009

name change due to spam,,

Mrs. Barn looks over my shoulder, “The Hell?”
Lately I have spent a lot of time at the "Porn for the Blind" site.(click here) It’s a non profit deal dedicated to describing porn for blind people.
You watch the porn and describe it as best you can,, without laughing of course, and it is converted to audio.. It does conjure up an image of the poor horny blind bastard who is spankin it while listening to you.
“In the upper right there is a girl enjoying,, REALLY enjoying vaginal sex, while next to her is a large Cuban looking girl jumping on the bed. Her jumping is causing problems with the couples’s timing. The Cuban girl has had breast enhancements and they are slapping her in the face.”
Mrs. Barn asks why I am not doing something productive around here. And I have to explain to her the whole charity community service thing. She whacks me in the head and stomps out of the room in awe, or disgust. I can never tell them apart.
Doesn’t she get it? If I can help just one poor blind bastard get off,, from a safe distance, I am basically a fucking miracle worker! Not unlike Mother Teresa!
Probably because she’s all intimidated by my humanitarianism. Or my philanthropy. Which one is the one where you don’t give them any of your money but you do donate your time to reading porn to the blind so you can put it on your resume? That one.

You gotta listen to some of these! Too funny!


Anonymous said...

"fucking miracle worker"
a miracle working fucker

sandy a said...

OMG i just about fell asleep.

bananavida said...

didn't your mother ever tell you that too much and you'll go blind?

Julian in SC said...

Where in the world did you come up with this site? I had no flippn' idea that there was such a site. Glad I'm not blind but nice to know that there is some hope!!!



Anonymous said...

Barnacle, You are a true inspiration. Thank you. Colette