Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Dear Abbie Dear Abbie, you won't believe this,, my stomach makes noises whenever i kiss,,,

Time I cleared out some questions that have been sent in.
I should write a sex advice colum,, whaddaya think?
And this Muslim Hottie could chip in on the advice!

Dear Barnacle,
How is the road paving going?

Signed 'Interested'.

Since you are such an astute reader, never missing a detail, always up on the latest post, I am surprised you would ask.
But, just because, here it is.
The road is now paved from serenity all the way to the old chiney store is in S.B., known as 7-11.
I don’t know if they will put on another top coat or something but it is as nice as any hyway in the country right now!

Pay attention you butt-cheek.


Hey Barnacle,
What’s this about them putting a bus stop near mango’s?
Does Maya Beach really need a bus stop?

Signed 'Gringo Tim'

Yo, Tim,

Yes, as we can all see, not only will there be a need for a bus stop or 3, but they will need to add a few more buses to keep up with the population growth.
I have been reliably told, this bus stop your are referring to is to be placed at the mouth of the PUBLIC BEACH ACCESS. And as we all knew, that will cause uproar from the person who believes they own said PUBLIC BEACH ACCESS.
The games are afoot.


Hi Barnacle,

Just what do those women do during ‘ladies night’? I have heard some weird things go on and since Mrs. Barn has been attending I thought maybe she leaked some info?

Signed 'Alone in Texas'

Texas 1,

Not a chance there pal. Seems they took some kind of blood oath, swore on a stack of esquire magazines or sometin. She ain’t talking.

Hell, one night during an exceptionally randy love makin session, one where I was at my peak, using all new moves and shit, I tried to squeeze something outa her in-between grunts and moans.
In fact, I musta ruined the moment because she just yawned and switched the TV channel while I kept grunting and moaning?
Women,, go figure.

Barn the stud!

Hi Barnacle,

Are there really zombies in the Breach?

Signed 'Doubtful'.

Oh Doubtful one,

You swing by Mango’s any night near closing time and let me know what you find!
Wear your garlic undies! No, wait. Garlic don’t work on Zombies, it’s for vampires.
Just don’t feed them and you should be OK,, for awhile anyway.



Barnacle said...

comment moved to correct post,,

Anonymous said...

Your Big Ass feet arent in the pic between the sheets You would need a BIGGER Lens!! Ha!! Ha!! but i still read your stuff!!
Hope you dont end up with neighbors with the picture you took of Big house on each side of you??