Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Guess what I saw a mouse doing,,,

I’m just not really sure what to think about this.
Let me ‘splain.
Awhile back I noticed one day that Mrs. Barn is now storing her toothbrush out in the ‘living room’ area of ‘Chez barnacle.

I said hmmmm, what’s up with this. I pressed her for an explanation and heres what I got.

Seems she had just read somewhere about all the germs floating in the air in a bathroom. A bathroom that has a crapper is even worse. And since the Master Bath here does indeed have a throne, she opted to remove her toothbrush from the lingering green cloud that permeates the air in there.

Notice she left my brush behind.
So about this time I point to all her dental floss that remained in the ‘room of death’ to which she shrugged off and said ‘it’s in the cabinit’. Her hair brush, ‘don’t brush my teeth with it’.
The only thing that made her stop and think was when I told her I had seen a mouse humpin the hell outa her tooth brush, and I didn’t stop him. But after a few minutes she decided she didn’t believe me.
Then I told her about how I used to sneak her chap stick outa her purse and give it a twirl around the cat’s ass then sneak it back into her purse.
She kinda ran the back of her hand across her lips and called ‘bullshit’. But that one I think she believes.

So anyway, look at my tooth brush sitting all alone in there, marinating in toxic fumes, (as if my turds stink, HA), while hers enjoys the nice clean atmosphere out where the house geckos wander.

Women,, I tell ya.

My next bitch, and I promise it will be the last one today, is this.
I am done, I quit, and never again will I buy cookies or tortillas off the shelf. For the last time I have strung up my hammock, poured a nice glass of cold milk, grabbed some cookies and settled in for some quality tube time only to have the first bite of cookie taste like soap! It happens all too often.
It’s the same taste in the tortillas as well,, soap.
My assumption is that someone is not rinsing their cookware enough after they wash it, and it leaves behind a taste.

On the bright side, at least I assume they are washing their stuff.
So,, if by the odd chance one of you readers is the one making the cookies or tortillas,, rinse the pots and pans better!!!
It could be worse, they could be letting their dough rise in the bathroom!

"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose."


Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention my toothbrush sanitizer died. Thanks for looking after my toothbrush for me. LOL.

sherrypitt said...

Dear Barnacle, Thank you so much for including my brother Ron in your newsletter. The pictures are priceless. Did you know him well? Please email me and tell me all you can. I was so hoping to have him come home again.

Sharon Harris

Thank you

David A said...

Funny you posted this. Just watched an episode of Mythbusters who proved this wrong. They found a toothbrush left in the kitchen had way more!!