Thursday, January 29, 2009

Little Dicks, Big Asses and Spleens,, OH MY,,

OK, I’ll admit it. I like the little wieners-in-a-can myself. The ones from Armor are good. I ate them as a kid and will still share a can with Scurvy every now and then.
But these little dicks are NASTY!! Never, ever buy the ones with the photo of Beaver Cleaver on the lable. (2.50bz, 5-oz can)
But folks down this way gobble em up! They are even behind the bar at some taverns as munchies?











They never expire, but the ‘best by' date on this can is 2015!
Let’s examine the ingredients, shall we.
First item of interest is Chicken skin. Followed by Pork skin. For those of you wanting to recreate this recipe at home, start saving your pig and chicken skin. These two items alone spell nothing but flavor!
Next we see my favorite, Pork Spleens! I swear I have never seen the word SPLEEN in the ingredients of any label! This is some special shit!

A little further down the list you see Pork Stomachs. Just toss some of them in there for texture I suppose.
When I ate these, I could swear I tasted just a hint of pig eyelids, and maybe some chicken rectums but I guess that is all covered in the Mechanically Separated Chicken portion of the recipe?
The rest is just spices and chemicals.
You can fry them, stew them, boil them, nuke ‘em, I don’t care what you do,, THEY SUCK!!!

Everyone ‘bout done gaggin?
Trust me, and you know you can! Never eat these things!!


RUMOR OF THE DAY: I love rumors. To watch them fester and take on a life of their own is great entertainment.
I hear that a certain resort owner pitched such a bitch about losing some trees and possibly,, ah em,, a fountain, that the road crew said “fine, we won’t pave at all in front of here.”
Won’t that be great? 200ft of dirt and mud pit right in the middle of the expressway?

HOT BUNS OF THE DAY:


Ok, that was cruel. And since I know there are some readers out there of the softer persuasion, and possible a few males who swing that way also,, heres one for you. Don’t say I never thought of you.






Gawd,, that hurt!








“Hey women. I’m startin to happen over here. You may now swoon freely in orgasmic abandon as I offer up the intense visual delight and fantasy flight within the fullness of my plumage!”

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yum! Thank you for the yumminess, Barn! And I dont' mean the canned wienies or those old ladies either!

Barnacle said...

oh you tramp!!!

Anonymous said...

Please have that gift wrapped and delivered down here ASAP;-)

Barnacle said...

uuuhhh,, that's me. 3 years ago!

Shopgirl said...

UMMM....I think he missed a spot. I'll be right there to lick, I mean wipe, that off for him!

Anonymous said...

If cigarettes have to have health warnings then I believe Vienna sausages should too.

Anonymous said...

now we know you have a very open, kind mind with sharing "the other kind of photo" for us softies.....nice too...
butts were good too yesterday. equality for all. what a blog! :D

LandShark 5150 said...

Once a Navy man always -- a Navy Man?